That Rock Will Never See it Coming

Back in May I did a cleanse. It turned out to be awesome! Eating raw and vegan was pretty cool for a month. I don't think I could do it for too long but it was nice to pull in the reigns of my impulsive eating. You can't possibly realize how much you rely on certain foods until you can't eat them anymore. So the cleanse was awesome for that. And I learned I love spinach in my smoothies. So, when my nutritionist mentioned she was putting one together for this season I was all up in it. However, three days in and I am really, really hurting.

What's the difference is between that cleanse and this cleanse? I've no idea. Besides the fact that it's not the same food. Last time was raw. This time it's soups and baked fruits. I have only made a few recipes and it could be that I've just not found the recipes that will really make it happen for me. Last time three days in I was coasting. Today is most certainly better than yesterday but I would hardly say I'm coasting. I can only hope tomorrow will be increasingly easier. And then after that I'll be okay. Yes?

I just have to remind myself that I'm doing this so my body works at full steam. A reset just in time for all the holiday eating and silly justifications. "It's Halloween. I NEVER eat Butterfingers so I'm going to eat five!" "I love ginger snaps. They are Christmas to me. I'll eat twenty." I can go a few days without eating chocolate or other sugars. I've proven that I can. Blerg. It's very telling what I miss and don't miss. I'm not missing cheese or bread. But then again I don't eat much of either as it is. I miss Taco Bell and chocolate covered almonds and hot chocolate topped in whipped cream. I haven't even craved my favorite snack- popcorn. I think what this means is I've been relying too much on those foods I'm craving the most. I'm scared I'll just go back to eating that stuff all the time. I probably will just be more conscious of what I'm craving and what that means. Quite frankly, I'd be ecstatic if I accomplished that. Emotional eating is my Sisyphus. I'm going to take that rock and teach it who's boss. Oh yeah. But until then, I'm hungry.