She Had an Offer I Couldn't Refuse

I've never felt close to any aunts or uncles. They are all such... special people. Neither my father's sister nor my mother's brothers seemed to be very interested in forging a relationship with me and in all fairness I wasn't really trying to have one with them either. They're all just these people who knew my parents when and for what it's worth none of them were ever close to my parents so why would they start with me? Eh. Growing up I didn't have this sense of family beyond what my parents created for me. Well, except for one person. She was my godmother and her name is Lynn Sipos.

My mom told me the story about how she met Aunt Lynn in an airport when they bumped into each other at the baggage carousel. I don't know if it was even Aunt Lynn or someone else in the story but according to Mom, she and Aunt Lynn had the same luggage set and they picked up each others' pieces in mistake. They soon figured it out and became best friends. That's all these women needed- a similar taste in luggage design. That story says so much about them each. They had hearts big enough to love a chance stranger for the rest of their lives. Who makes friends like that any more?

I was the first child born to either of them and Aunt Lynn became my godmother. My Aunt Lynn was so much more than a spiritual guide to me. She provided a sense of familial love I wasn't getting anywhere else, the sort of unconditional love you can only get from someone who doesn't make up 50% of your DNA. She was the aunt I never had.

Both of our families were in the military so we didn't live near her for the vast majority of our relationship. That didn't matter. I always knew she was thinking of me. She never forgot a birthday, a Christmas, or even an Easter. It's not that she showered me with gifts, not at all. All it took was a card or a note she dropped in the mail. I kept every thing she did give me which included a crocheted blanket, a money bank with a misspelling of my name, a copy of Anne of Green Gables with an inscription from her. Her thoughtfulness was how I knew she loved me as if I were blood.

Aunt Lynn died of breast cancer when I was ten years old. She was the first person I knew to die. She was the first dead person I'd ever seen. And hers was my first funeral, to which I wore a pink dress, a dress she made for me. I remember the wet and dark drive to her service. No one really said anything. We either couldn't comprehend, couldn't understand, or were just young. We drove straight to the funeral home and I bee-lined to her casket. I didn't know what to do so I knelt beside her and prayed. I prayed and I meant it for the first time in my life. I yelled at God for taking this beautiful woman from this shithole. It was the first time I was ever mad at God and all I could do was realize how much I would miss her. I don't even think I cried.

I cried later, once I realized how present she was in my life. For years I would tear up when I thought about her being gone and what she did for me. I never got to know her for myself. I only really knew of her. Sure, she visited with her family and we had a sort of correspondence but what could a ten year old really know about her godmother? I'm sure if she saw some of my temper tantrums she wouldn't have liked me that much. Just as well. I wonder about all the things she could've taught me but I'll never forget what she did. I know she's still out there somewhere. Someone with a heart like that doesn't ever really leave this spiritual plane. She's here with me every birthday, Christmas, or Easter. I still love her. And I miss her terribly.

October is Breast Cancer Awareness month and I recommend going to http://www.thebreastcancersite.com/ and clicking on the big pink button once a day, every day. All the sponsors of that site will donate money to provide free mammograms to women in need with every click. I do it every day so please join the fight. It's so easy to do.

I Love Political Cartoons

This is totally what I was talking about!

I'm Tryin' Here

Last Thursday I went to a symposium hosted by Emerging Upstate Arts Professionals with my box office manager and the marketing assistant at my theatre. We're all looking to network and meet more people like us- people who want to be a part of the arts community in the area in many capacities. As you know in my previous posts I'm really frustrated at the seeming lack of arts employment opportunities here. The symposium covered all kinds of topics including employment. I wish I could say I left feeling better about job prospects but I can't. I can, however, say that I feel like I've started something that is great for me in a way that's bigger than just getting a job. I've found a community.

I'm really lucky to have the boss I do at the theatre. We're closer in age than the other people who work in the box office and we both want to stick to management. Many of the other people there are younger and want to be actors. That's fine- we all love the theatre and I love talking shop with everyone there. This part time job has been really great for me. I don't make much extra cash but it's flexible, it's still extra money, and I'm with people who know what I'm talking about when I pick plays apart. (My co-worker last week said I would be a great theatre critic because I really pay attention to detail. Finally! Someone who doesn't stare at me blankly when I talk about the show we just saw.) Anyway, my boss and I don't work many shifts together but it's really great to be able to talk about the future of theatre, ways to market theatre, and audience development. She's really supportive of me trying to get into the community here. I wouldn't have found the EUAP without her and she let me hitch a ride to the symposium.

At the sympo I met a few other people. There weren't that many people there to begin with but it was better that way. We were able to meet everyone there and everyone I spoke to was really open to conversation be it about jobs or arts in the Capital District. I even ran into someone whose job I interviewed for when she was leaving the New York Arts Educator's Association. She remembered me and my resume! That was a boost. She even took my resume to pass on! It was a great first meeting and I can't wait for the one in December.

I plan on becoming an active participant with the EUAP. I even joined Americans for the Arts today to bolster my sense of community- even if it is a bigger, national group. But I don't care. I'm starting to feel connected. I even made friends with someone who is trying to get an arts job in the area and if I can get my act together we're going to reconnect through the interwebs.

All in all, the trip to the meeting was a success. I can't wait for the group to get bigger and include more performance people. Most people there were visual arts. I don't care. We're all working towards the same goal, something pretty amazing. This is very exciting for me.

Miscellany

On my way into work today I saw a woman with her son attached to her by a leash. I wonder if that's just going to make him a momma's boy.

I didn't notice the painter on my porch this morning until after I put on pants.

Men who like cats are cool and quite masculine.

Isn't it sort of funny that the colors of fall are so vibrant when the leaves are really dying? I would like to go out in a flash of color just like they do.

I really wish I could quit baked goods, or at least cut back, but it seems impossible.

I hate the holiday season and I dread its arrival.

How are these ballots legal?

I Truly Don't Understand

I can understand why people want the government out of their business. I don't want the government all up in my reproductive/sexual health business but I think that's different from what conservatives deem "little government." I was always sort of confused about what that means exactly but I know true conservatives don't like a lot of taxes. I could be very wrong here but do they not like taxes because they think government sponsored programs are handouts for lazy people? I'm not including property taxes for public education (how many conservatives really send their kids to public schools anyway?) or taxes that will pave the public roads. I just get the idea that the fiscal conservatives (who I know to be all rich white dudes anyway) want to do whatever they want to get the tremendous money they make and keep it for themselves. Forget Joe Six-pack- he's just not working hard enough. Do I get the gist of it? This brings me to my questions- if Bush is all about little government and tax cuts for the wealthy, why is he bailing out the rich pricks whose fiscal recklessness got us into this economic mess in the first place with government money? They paid relatively fewer taxes than I did and my tax money is bailing them out? Why is Bush using government money to buy the majority of stocks in failing businesses? Is he turning socialist? Do I not really understand socialism and conservatism? What will be the backlash for the economy a few years down the line?

I don't know if I like the government owning stock in volatile companies and I'm a bit of a pinko. Those bankers who will make more money in an hour than I do in a month, who want less government than I do, and who are really only losing their yacht because they aren't getting their $6 million bonus this year are getting a government handout. I understand that these are desperate times and desperate measures blah blah. But what a bunch of hypocrites. There are people out there who are honestly trying to live the (no longer attainable) American dream and they don't qualify for government aid but these guys do?

I can't wrap my brain around it so I'm appealing to someone who might. Anyone care to explain why people who want the government out of their business suddenly want the government to save their business?

Grammar is the Jam to My Language Toast

Today we're going to cover there, their, they're. It is important to not look like a boob in one's writing so we're going to discuss the difference between the three. They are frequently confused with one another and to say I didn't confuse them once or twice myself would be a lie. But I usually catch it and correct it in proof reading and that's why I look like just an idiot instead of a boob.

Here's today's quiz:

1) When the meals for Meals on Wheels are ready, Michelle Obama will make sure their on the correct bus.

2) Sarah Palin and her family doesn't realize that it is not okay to end all they're words without a hard "g." I guess over their in Alaska there ain't no "g's" to be found.

3) The Obama girls just love their Jonas Brothers.

4) The Palin girls totally paid attention to there abstinence only sex education.

This quiz is a little silly because most people know that their is the possesive of they, that they're is a contraction of they are, and there is a location. However, when people don't pay attention to what they are doing, it's easy to slip and type the incorrect word. It doesn't help at all that they all sound exactly the same in one's head. So, how'd you do?

1) When the meals for Meals on Wheels are ready, Michelle Obama will make sure they're on the correct bus.

2) Sarah Palin and her family doesn't realize that it is not okay to end all their words without a hard "g." I guess over there in Alaska there ain't no "g's" to be found.

3) The Obama girls just love their Jonas Brothers.

4) The Palin girls totally paid attention to their abstinence only sex education.

There was a trick in there- #2 had three uses and two were incorrect. The third there was used correctly. The only fully correct answer was #3. It's true those little rascals just love those queer Jonas brothers. Yes, indeedy.

What a Pisser

My cat is a very high maintenance, very self involved, very emotionally needy cat. Whenever the fridge door opens, she's there thinking it's time to eat. Whenever I'm at the bathroom sink, she's there thinking it's time to drink. Whenever I'm walking to bed, she's there thinking it's her pillow. She used to puke a lot because she's allergic to turkey and fish and cat food is full of it. That was a serious process of elimination to find the few flavors of cat food she can eat. And she loves attention so much she'll stare at a complete stranger until they give her room on his or her lap. My cat is special.

I didn't realize how special she was until Mike and I were out of town for 36 hours back in September. We got home and I was looking forward to bed after a long day. I said goodnight and headed down the hall, cat in tow. Not until I put my hand under my pillow did I find the big puddle of cat piss. The cat had peed where my pillow meets the comforter. Where I put my face. WHERE I PUT MY FACE. She soaked through to the foam mattress cover. What a little shit.

She'd peed in places other than the litter box before but that was when we were trying a new litter and the urine puddled at the bottom unbeknown to the fellow in charge of cleaning the litter. So it was never cleaned properly. Fluffy let her disapproval known by peeing on the bath mat. Three times. So the cat doesn't like a full litter box. Okay. But this was the litter she likes... We cleaned the litter and closed the bedroom door for a few days. All was well until a week or so later. I was going to bed after a particularly shitty day only to find the cat had done it again! This time was personal. She didn't pee where Mike slept. NooOOooo. Where I slept. I thought we were friends. Jerk.

Thanks to the process of elimination it's all about the litter box. She's acting normal, she's not peeing anywhere else- only places where sanitation is IMPERATIVE, and she hasn't done it since I've been cleaning her litter every day or two. I guess the princess needs a pristine litter box. Whatever, I don't blame her. I wouldn't want to step in day old pee and poo so why should she? Some of the sheets are still in the laundry covered in urine because I haven't had the time or quarters to wash them. I know, I know- the sooner they're washed the better. But they've also been soaking in an elixir known to eliminate the smell of cat pee. We'll see how this goes.

One question- I can't tell if my down pillow smelled of wet down or of cat pee. It's now fully dried and doesn't really smell any more but I can't be sure. Do I need to wash the pillow for a third time?

How Does Putin Take His Tea, Sarah?

I have to admit- I didn't watch the first presidential debate. I think I was working. But I will totally watch the next two. I'm going to make a very simple drinking game out of it- whenever McCain mentions being a POW I'll drink and every time Obama flashes those pearly whites I'll throw one back. He has such nice teeth. You know who else has nice teeth? Joe Biden. Man, he has a nice smile. I would like to make him smile anytime...

So as you can tell I watched the VP debates. All I can really say about it is summed up like this: Biden talked policy, Palin talked passion. I say that about her because I've never had to focus so hard on what someone was saying. It is harder than understanding Shakespeare! And that dude was wordy. She is a passionate lady- I don't know if I would go so far as to say a maverick. What's so maverick about her? If anything she's just a higher profile "normal" American. And that's why she's dangerous. She knows she's on the ticket because she appeals to who Republicans' think are the only "real" Americans- middle class, middle of the country, blue collar, hasn't been outside the country (Canada and a resort in Mexico doesn't count), and feels isolated by Washington. That's why she looked into the camera the whole time- so those people could feel like she's talking right to them. I don't know about those folks, but I like my politicians to know more about the world than I do. Like Joe Biden. Hi Joe. How're those chompers?

Joe Biden actually answered the moderator's questions before going off on rhetoric and if he felt he didn't answer, he went back to make sure he did. There were times where she didn't answer the question but just started yapping. Or in her word, "Yappin'." Biden seemed restrained. I can't blame him because he had a tightrope to walk. He needed to attack her but he can't be condescending or perceived as a bully. I think he could've taken more shots at her. Not personal shots but just been a little sharper on her. Not once did I think he was talking down to her. He talked to her like an equal but he was wearing kid gloves. Put on some real gloves, Joe!

This election makes me nervous. This race shouldn't be so much of a competition. It's good to see McCain pulled his campaign out of Michigan because that means he lost a swing state. It seems he's realizing his weak spots. He just needs to realize his biggest weak spot is the inability to bring change. Picking a woman running mate isn't the change this country needs! What is the matter with this place? Thank God I live in New York. It's full of bleeding hearts. Hey Joe, want to come visit Albany? It's so pretty up here and I've got some great jokes to tell you...