April 13, 2010

Endochrine Fail

Yesterday my chauffeur took me to my annual physical. He's on vacay this week so to spend some work-day time with him, I asked him to help me save some time by not riding the bus. I love having my annual done as much as I love getting my teeth cleaned. (And I LOVE getting my teeth cleaned. It's like Christmas comes three times a year.) Who doesn't love hearing about the tip-top shape she's in? I would like them that much more if I didn't have to pay attention to what underwear I was putting on but heck- don't we all feel that way? At least at the physical I can leave them on.

But I digress. As with every physical I'm required to have blood-work done. I would rather have a PAP with a cold speculum than get my blood drawn. I simply cannot handle a needle going directly into my vein. There is something inherently wrong with the whole thing. Blech, shiver, blerg! But I do it to ensure my overall healthiness. For the past few years nothing in the blood-work has changed- excellent cholesterol, fantastic organ function, and perfect sugar levels. But this time, I was not so lucky.

It appears my thyroid has been slacking off. Sometimes we just have a slow day. Maybe Thyroid has a head-cold. Maybe Thyroid freaked out at the whole needle thing. We don't know. That's why I have to go back in three months to have MORE BLOOD DRAWN. My veins do not like this too-frequent VIOLATION! It ruins my whole day. Not even the post-trauma-donut can help.

I must confess, I'm relieved to hear Thyroid might need a little help. I was just reading about thyroid disorders and with some new developments I was wondering if something was legitimately up. My skin has been abnormally dry for quite a long time, I was having some strange appetite problems back in the fall and since then my weight is creeping up no matter what I try. Combined, those symptoms are indicative of thyroid misfire. So in three months we'll see. Until then I'll throw some headstands into my yoga routine to give Thyroid a little stimulation. Maybe he's been feeling a little rejected and this will be the love he needs.

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