November 20, 2008

I Just Want to Want Something, Anything

Lately I haven't had much of an appetite. Well, it's more than loss of appetite. The thought of all kinds of things make me nauseous. I love an avocado roll from down the street but today I had to force myself to eat one out of necessity. I couldn't have just miso soup for lunch. That would be silly. Earlier this week I forced down a turkey sandwich.

This has happened to me before. The first time it happened the only thing that wouldn't make me flirt with nausea was the vegetable lo mien at my favorite Fredericksburg Chinese restaurant. I ate a lot of that for a few weeks. That was back when I was fat. I could enjoy lo mien guilt free. I don't know why lo mien was okay but other things made me cringe. It's totally greasy and not good for you. Maybe it didn't bother my stomach because of the rice I would eat with it. The rice must've absorbed all the stuff that would make me feel more ill. That leads me to believe that these moments of starvation are in my head.

Then again, on Sunday night/Monday morning, I woke with terrible stomach pain and the beginning of this week's wave of nausea. I was lucky I could go back to sleep. Thanks to that I've felt off all week. Not like myself at all. First of all, I LOVE food. So why I wouldn't want to eat anything is beyond me. To top it off, I've had no desire to work out at all- sleeping in aside. Hopefully this fit will pass before I hop on a plane to DC. I wouldn't want my mom to think anything was wrong with her cooking. But if it gives me an excuse to request vegetable lo mien, so be it.

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