March 3, 2009

Everyone's Got Issues, Man

I schedule my therapy appointments for 8am so I can go before work. This means I'm the first crazy person in my therapist's day. Woo! Whatever, she thinks I'm really funny and it's really a great way to start my day. And since I've been taking the bus to therapy it gives me lots of time to go over the things we discussed in my head. All around, 8am is the way to go!

More often than not, when I leave her office there's no one waiting in the tiny waiting room. Lately, however, there has been a person waiting each visit. I don't care but I feel like I should because none of them look at me when I'm leaving like they invaded my privacy. I'm always smiling when I leave, it's not like my make-up is streaming or I have snot dripping out of my nose. If anything I'm a reassurance that therapy is AWESOME! But since they don't look at me, I only notice them peripherally, like oh there's a person there. But it's almost as if they are ashamed to be there. They even walk into the office with their eyes cast downward like someone caught them. I've never seen those people again but there were a few weeks in a row a few years back where I knew the person in the waiting room. I was like, oh hey- haha we go to the same shrink, whatever. We never talked about it. It was just like, oh I know you- moving on.

I wonder if these people think there's a stigma even within the mental health community. Like, it's cool if someone else needs a therapist BUT I DON'T! I'm FINE! Everyone's well aware there are people out there who feel that therapy is shameful or for people of weak character. Well, those people are full of shit and are likely the ones most in need of a therapist themselves. Therapy has helped me in ways I didn't anticipate. My therapist is not a yes-woman. That's not what I'm paying her for. I'm paying her to tell me when I'm really not thinking things through enough or with the right perspective or to tell me how to talk to people in a constructive way during an argument or to tell me that something I'm stressing about is neither here nor there. I've found my relationships to be healthier and happier thanks to therapy. And that is nothing to be ashamed about.

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