It appears that once you hit 30 (duh duh duuuuhhhhn) your body decides it's going to produce extra hair in places it doesn't belong. For me, it was relegated to my chin up until a month ago when I started noticing a shadow on my upper lip. Then I moved into the sunlight and discovered it was a friggin' MUSTACHE. A real one. On my face.
I tried to ignore it. I tried to pretend it was just the lighting. I mean, I didn't really scare myself when I'd look in the mirror, just startle a little bit. Then my friend Lynette "discreetly" motioned to her upper lip to point out I had something to take care of. I could ignore it no longer. So to the drug store I went where I debated depilatory cream or just bleach. The idea of a shiny upper lip with stubble growing back in scared me so I chose to bleach. But I bought the cream as well because it was on sale and if I ever changed my mind, I have this in my medicine cabinet.
Tonight I watched a bunch of teevee and decided I could multitask and bleach and watch teevee at the same time. But when I realized I could only have the stuff sit on my upper lip for eight minutes I decided to finally make egg salad out of the boiled eggs I had in the fridge. While I was chopping up the eggs a dollop of cream landed on my hand, barely missing the cutting board. How terrible would it have been to waste all those boiled eggs (ok, only three) because of my actual multitasking- not fake multitasking of watching teevee and upper lip bleaching? Luckily it was a-ok.
So. The bleach. Tingles. But makes my hair really blonde. Now let's see if the sunlight looks as bad on a blonde 'stache as it does on a dark 'stache. Wish me luck.